The List
by KazzahBlanca
Summary: Remus gives James 'The List' that will get him Lily Evans in his arms where she belongs. Light hearted, fun stuff. Fair read.Get's better later chapters. LilyJames. Go on, take a read. Some Swearing.
1. J

Ok just a little Lily/James drabble.

Good read.

Have to say it gets better later on.

But most of it's written.

So I'll post regulary.

Don't knock it til you've tried it.

So thanks.

Please enjoy.

Disclaimer: I only own the OC characters. None of JK's master pieces though!!!

x

**'The List'**

James Potter strolled lazily down the corridor of the Hogwarts Express, his trunk levitating steadily behind him. He yawned slightly in that 'bad boy' kind of way, making a few of the girls watching him from their compartments swoon or burst into a fit of contagious giggles.

A red headed girl, fiery tempered yet gentle and kind rolled her eyes at his bad attempts of suaveness. She was used to his manners and they quite frankly bored her.

"Prongs mate! How was your summer?" A particularly handsome boy of about 16 asked.

"Great Padfoot, I got contact lenses" He pointed to his eyes and sure enough his previously geeky and rounded glasses had been replaced with two glossy contact lenses. He ruffled his hair with one of his hands and flashed an award winning smile.

"Remus mate how's it going?" The one called Padfoot asked a pale looking boy with a few scars etched into his otherwise handsome face.

"Sirius, James, great to see you guys!" He replied, embracing the two in an all man hug. Sirius ended it with a pat on the back for both of them, attempting to keep his cool, rebel stature.

"James, Sirius, Remus!" A short, chubby boy with watery eyes had just run up to them like a child in a sweet shop. He clasped James' arm as though letting go would surely kill him.

"Wormtail, what's going on with you?"

"Nothing, I'm just so excited to see you guys again! Being stuck at home was the worst thing ever!" James and Sirius rolled their eyes at the boy and exchanged knowing grins.

"Ahhh Lily my darling" The red headed girl from before had left her compartment to find her friend when her way was blocked by the 4 boys known to Hogwarts as The Marauders.

"Go away Potter, let me through"

"Why no please?"

"You don't deserve a please"

"You know what I do deserve? A date, from you"

"Whatever" she said getting bored. These boys didn't scare her, but it didn't mean she couldn't help feeling uncomfortable around them.

"Magic words"

"Avada Kedavra" she scoffed. Sirius winked at her and she grimaced, a look of disgust spread on her face.

"Aren't we smart Evans?" James winked at her as well, she wished they would stop doing it; it made her feel like a piece of meat on a Butchers stall.

"How about this, I let you through for a date?"  
"Why do you want a date so badly?" She asked him. His grin became wider and wider with every word she spoke.

"You're so cute Evans"

"Leave me alone!" She hissed, pushing her way through the boys, James' trunk which was still levitating behind him swung dangerously in the air and hit Peter over the head. His eyes welled up with tears but he hid his face before anyone could notice.

"Ouch Evans that was my foot" Sirius laughed, he stuck out his leg to trip her up and she toppled a little. Remus caught her arm before she could fall however and steadied her on her feet.

"Are you ok?" He asked her, his eyes scanning her livid expression.

"Yes, thanks, I'm fine" She tugged her arm away from his grip and continued walking away from the boys. One of them muttered a small incantation beneath their breath and just as the girl was about to disappear into an open compartment her school skirt blew up revealing a pair of rather attractive blue French knickers. The boys wolf whistled behind her and Sirius and James shared a high 5. Remus didn't integrate in this behaviour, he felt gutted for her, he wanted to run after her, he wanted to shout at the other boys. He saw her hastily pull down her skirt, scream and flee into the compartment, slamming the door behind her.

"That was horrible" He told them, shaking his head.

"Oh come on Moony it was only a joke"

"It was a cruel joke"

"That doesn't make it any less of a joke" James laughed and Sirius joined in. Peter however simply stood there staring at the same spot Lily had been in a minute ago, a mixture of awe and glee spread across his features.

"I'm going to see how she is" Remus said, turning to leave.

"You saw how she treated you just then, she'll only tell you to piss off"

"Well at least I can try" He hurried off down the corridor, looking behind him a few times to check they wouldn't pull his trousers down to his ankles. He knocked on the door and before he could receive an answer he slid the door open and entered the compartment.

"What –sob- do –sob- you –sob- want?" Lily sat there with her head in her hands, tears pouring from her heavily mascarered eyes, a girl with long blonde hair stroking her back in comfort.

"I wanted to see if you were ok"

"Why, didn't you find it hilariously funny as well?" She asked looking up at him, the long black streaks of makeup running down her face made him gush with sympathy for her.

"No. I didn't actually"

"Why not?"

"Because I don't like making fun of other people"

"Then you really picked the wrong crowd to be hanging round with Remus" He looked down.

"But they accept me"

"And so would a lot of other people"

"No. No I don't think they would Lily"

"Well I would, and that's saying something" He smiled at her and she smiled back through her tears, before a fresh spurt erupted from her eyes and she fell back into her hands saying:

"I feel so humiliated!"

"Don't worry; I'm sure it was only us who saw. I think it's the first time Peter's seen a girls' underwear so he was pretty astounded by the sight" She attempted to laugh but it sounded more like a strangled cough.

"Why are you being so nice to me?" She asked him looking up.

"When haven't I been nice to you?"

"I dunno…you're always nice to me" she mumbled, shrugging her shoulders.

"There you go then" He smiled at her and took a seat opposite her. He placed a hand on her knee and she looked at him for a minute. Her bottom lip trembled suddenly and she started crying all over again.

"I hate James Potter!" She screamed. She got up from her seat and banged the compartment wall. She pushed the sliding doors away from each other until they crashed either side of the compartment and rebounded off the wall. Remus had to pull her away from the doors just before she got caught in between them.

"Be careful Lily!" He grabbed her arms and wrapped his own tightly around her body. The girl who had been sitting next to her, whose name was Jessica sat watching like a goldfish, mouth open, unaware of what to do next.

"I'm gonna KILL HIM!" She roared struggling against his strong grip.

"No you're not"

"Not while you're holding me, let go Remus, let GO!" She was useless against him.

"Calm down"

"Jessica, kick him in the balls!" Jessica just sat there.

"No Jessica, please don't!" He pleaded, although she made no attempt to move either way.

"Please Remus let me go! I'll…I'll go on a date with you" He immediately let go of her, startled. She laughed uncontrollably like a maniac and slid open the doors again. Before he had time to react she was gone, the cloak from her uniform the last thing to vanish from sight.

"Lily no! Come back Lily!" He followed her into the corridor; she was racing away down it, her wand in her hand. She stopped abruptly in front of a compartment and made to open the door. "NO!" Remus jumped on top of her and they lay sprawled across the floor.

"REMUS LUPIN!" She attempted to bite the hand he had her held down with. The brawl had attracted the Marauders attention and they were soon standing in front of the two on the floor watching them struggle against each other.

"What in the name of Merlin's thick ear hair is going on?" Sirius asked bewildered.

"POTTER!" Lily shrilled. James looked taken aback, a little scared even.

"Yes Lily?"

"ARGHHH!"

"Prongs mate I would stay away if I was you" Remus warned, looking up. Lily took the chance to knee him directly in the bollocks. He roared in pain and fell back. The girl got to her feet and made to draw her wand but couldn't find it in her pocket. She patted herself down in search for it, however instead, leaning against the compartment door, was James Potter, holding her wand in his hand, an expression of amusement on his face.

"Give me my wand Potter or so help me Merlin!"

"So help you Merlin what you silly little girl?"

"Don't call me a silly little girl"

"Silly Lily" He taunted, moving closer towards her. She was being backed up against an open window; her heart beat was soaring with all of the anticipation and action.

"My wand Potter" She held out her hand as calmly as she could, she stumbled a little over a piece of rubbish on the floor.

"Potter please" He said with a grin plastered across his face.

"Please Potter" She sighed. She was fully backed against the wall now. Remus was still huddled on a ball on the floor. Peter was at his side looking excited. Sirius was laughing at her and James. James lifted up the hair by her ear and leaned in to whisper into it.

"Thank you Lily" His soft breath against her skin sent shivers soaring down her spine. As he left her ear she could have sworn he brushed his lips against her neck. He tossed her, her wand and before she could react had held his own in between her eyes. "Don't try anything smart Evans, I'm too quick for your games" Her blood boiled inside her, twice he had humiliated her that _hour_. She ran off to the bathrooms, too angry to cry anymore. Once she had sorted out her face and her hair she set off back to her compartment. Jessica, the friend she had gone to pick up was already inside with the rest of her friends, recalling what had happened with Lily and Remus.

"Lily! Are you ok?!" A short girl with dark hair asked her.

"No, but I will be once you tell me where you got those fabulous shoes!" Lily beamed. She was not about to let James Potter get her down that day. It was her first day of 6th year at Hogwarts and as an outstanding member of the prefect team she had to be fully prepared and ready to take on any obstacle thrown at her. Including insufferable boys.


	2. A

Disclaimer: I own no one!

**'The List'**

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"I can't believe she kneed you in the crotch Moony!"

"What a bitch"

"She's not a bitch"

"Remus how can you defend her?"

"She was upset"

"Well better you than me I say ha-ha"

"That was harsh James"

"Yeah…sorry Remus"

"That's ok" The boys were in a carriage on the way to the castle. There was still room for 2 more but they kicked the other two boys out so they could discuss Marauder issues.

"She's mine this year, I can feel it, she wants me" James was so full of himself. Remus felt a trickle of jealousy spread through his body at the boy's confidence in himself.

"Ha-ha good one mate!" Sirius said slapping him on the back.

"I was being serious" James said through gritted teeth.

"Oh yeah…yeah right I knew that" Padfoot looked away out of the window. "Hey we're here"

The carriages stopped and the boys stumbled out of the doors.

"Home sweet home" Remus breathed in the sweet scent that was Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry. They followed their fellow pupils up the stairs and into the Great Hall. Sirius pushed over a couple of 5th years and when they attempted to push back he barked in their faces.

"Freak" One of them muttered.

"Oh no! Oh no, oh no, oh no!" James cried.

"What is it Prongs?"

"My contact popped out! I can't see!"

"Take the other one out and wear your glasses then"

"But I'll look like a geek!"

"Either way James you still look like a geek"

"Eff you Padfoot"

"Woof!" He laughed, pushing the boys shoulder as he rummaged in his pockets for his glasses. He placed them back on the ridge of his nose and could see clearly again.

Over the other side of the maddening crowd Lily Evans stood by her best friend Ellie.

"Gross Lily, what's that thing in your hair?"

"What?" She asked, lacing her fingers through her silky hair. She pulled out a small opaque object, a contact lens.

"That's disgusting" Lily grimaced, shaking it from her fingertips, "It must be Potters, no wonder he wasn't wearing those stupid glasses anymore"

"Prefects over here please!" McGonagall's voice boomed over the heads of the students. Lily pushed her way hurriedly through the crowds, Remus on her heel.

"Hey Lily"

"Oh Remus…Remus I'm so sorry I hurt you I-"

"It's ok, no need to apologise"

"Thank you" She said, taking his hand in hers.

"All gather round me please, yes, yes you too Prewitt. No McIntyre this isn't a Quidditch meeting. What on earth is that hideous creature you're holding Bennet? Oh it's your cat…prefects you will each be situated in different places on your house tables. 5th years will be nearest the doors, 6th years in the middle of the tables and 7th years at the end nearest the teachers table, does everyone understand? Good, I have 50 1st years waiting to be sorted whom have currently been left with Professor Binns; I must attend to them as soon as humanly possible!" She scurried off in the direction of the Great Hall. Lily found a group of Gryffindors' and ushered them into the hall.

"You there! No pushing else I'll take so many house points away your house glass will disintegrate"

"Lily, I think we're sitting over here" Remus took her hand and led her to the Gryffindor table. They each took a seat opposite each other and watched as the room filled up with eager faced children. The Marauders no doubt came to join them, causing Lily much discomfort.

"This is only for 4th years actually" Lily said rather resentfully.

"Says who?"

"Says McGonagall"

"Says McGonagall" Sirius mimicked her. James and Peter laughed. Remus put his head in his hands.

"Good old Moony wants us here don't you Moony?" James asked Remus, slapping him lightly on the arm.

"Well…I…erm"

"No he doesn't, so leave" Lily was getting flustered now, her cheeks glowing red.

"Look at that Evans looks like a tomato"

"On fire!" Peter added, looking hopefully at the other two boys for approval. They laughed so it must have been acceptable.

"Leave her alone"

"Moony?"

"Please James"

"I was only having a laugh"

"She doesn't find it funny, can't you tell?"

"I reckon she's just playing hard to get, don't you Padfoot?" James leaned into Lily's face and blew slightly into her pursed lips.

"Stop it Potter" He took this as an invitation to lean in closer and kiss her, she was so surprised that, before his lips could even reach hers, she was on the verge of falling back off her seat when a boy sitting next to her on the other side grabbed her round the waist and pulled her back up.

"Thank you" She breathed, shaking the hand of her hero.

"That's ok, I'm always here to help a damsel in distress" He winked at her and she found herself swooning over his luscious brown eyes.

"And as for you Potter" She said turning round, "eat pond scum" and she punched him squarely in the jaw. He yelped with pain, shocked at her reaction, normally when he tried to kiss a girl they would be thrilled, what was wrong with Lily Evans?

Lily went back to the boy who had helped her, she found herself talking to him through the sorting and feast, much to James annoyance.

"It was nice talking to you Lily"

"You too Jeremy…I'll erm…see you later then?"

"Sure, I mean, I'm only in the common room if you ever need me"

"Yeah, yeah…common room. Right" He waved her off as she rounded up the new first years she was to be showing to the Gryffindor Common Room.

"Don't worry James, she'll be yours in no time" Sirius reassured him.

"Unless this Jeremy guy gets there first"

"Jeremy's in 4th year, not 5th year like he told Lily, he's only 14!"

"Great! At least that's one less I have to worry about"

"Who else is there to worry about?"

"Remus"

"REMUS?"

"Remus"

"You must be kidding me"

"Haven't you heard the way he talks about her, looks at her, defends her?"

"Yeah, so?"

"He loves her, it's so obvious"

"No it's not" They turned around to face a blushing Remus.

"We thought you were doing prefect duties"

"I was, I came back"

"Oh…we were only joking you know Moony, we didn't really mean it"

"I think James did, didn't you James?"

"Yeah actually, I did" He looked at Remus through narrowed eyes.

"Well you were wrong"

"Oh come off it Remus you fancy the pants off her"

"No, not off Lily"

"Then why are you always so nice to her"

"You're nice to friends"

"You don't even know her"

"No James, _you_ don't know her. I know a lot about her, her favourite colours pink, which kills her inside because she can never wear it with her red hair. Her birthdays on the 30th of January. She hates anything raw, including most raw vegetables. She has a birthmark just below her right ankle that's in the shape of a tiny butterfly. Her favourite singer is Madonna, she's a muggle."

"Sounds a bit like you stalk her to me mate" James grumbled.

"Not stalk Prongs, _talk_, you should try it once in a while, instead of always trying to get into her pants"

"I never try and get into her pants!"

"Really? You could have fooled me"

"If you don't fancy her then why are you so obsessed with her?"

"Because she's my friend, it's not an obsession!"

"Why do you always give me faces when I talk about her then?"

"Because I'm jealous ok!"

"Of what?"

"The way you can just expect a girl to jump into your arms! The way you're a free person! The way you can flirt with a girl without any problem at all!"

"So can you!"

"No girl likes me for who I am"

"How do you know? If you're always putting yourself down people will stop making an effort with you!"

"It comes so easy for you James, Sirius stands there talking about you getting the girl you want and all you can do is agree! What if just this once the girl you want doesn't want you?!" And with that he had stormed out of the dorm, fury shaking his entire body.

"What's his problem?" James asked the other two; they looked away and answered with a mumble.

Remus clenched his fists so tight he was in danger of breaking the skin; he needed to get away from his 'friends' he needed to be on his own.

"Remus, hey" Lily had done a double take, not noticing him at first.

"Oh, hey"

"Are you ok?"

"No"

"What's wrong?"

"I've just been accused of being in love with you"

"Oh…thanks" She said sarcastically looking a little disgruntled.

"No, sorry, I didn't mean it like that, it's just I've had a falling out with James about it"

"Oh, Potter, the source of all Merlin's problems" He managed a small smile, he did love her, but it wasn't the sort of love James had thought. He loved her as a friend, a sister, even a guardian. She was his best friend deep down, although he hadn't told the Marauders or her come to think of it. He loved the touch of her skin against his own; she loved the fact that she knew everything about him, including his 'gift' as she referred to it as.

"Remus you look pale…is the full moon near?"

"I think so…a week maybe"

"Have you got your potion?"

"In my trunk" He muttered.

"I can help you"

"Thank you Lily"

"Oh don't be silly, the amount of times you've helped me today" She waved her arm in the air as though shooing away a piece of nonsense floating by. They both smiled, they liked each others company.

"So tell me all about Potter's little rant then" She said taking his arm in hers. He breathed in her sweet scent and felt relaxed again.


	3. M

Ok so here's another chapter.

Aye, not one of my best.

Will get better.

Promises!!!

I OWN NO ONE!

x

Enjoy!!!

**'The List'**

"He obviously fancies her Padfoot!"

"I really don't think he does Prongs"

"Then why doesn't he want me to go out with her"

"He never said that"

"No but he said she doesn't like me"

"Well Prongs…maybe he was right"

"No he wasn't she loves me!"

"But you've never really talked to her before have you?"

"I did so! That one time she asked me what our next lesson was!"

"Isn't that the time she hexed you for looking up her skirt?"

"Shut up Sirius!"

"What I'm trying to say is that you should take it slow you know, maybe Remus will help you figure out how to win her heart"

"Yeah…yeah it sounds good. So you're telling me I shouldn't be full on with her then?"

"That's right"

"Can I snog her?"

"What says she'll snog you?"

"Good point. Thanks Sirius"

"You're welcome James"

Lily and Remus stood outside the portrait of the fat lady talking, a lot.

"Thanks Lily, you've really helped me calm down"

"Ahh Remus my friend, anything to help a mate" They smiled at each other with great liking.

"Well I better get off now; I'll see you at breakfast then? And aren't we doing prefect duties together tomorrow?"

"Yeah, yeah we are" She gave him one last hug and they climbed through the portrait hole together and separated into their different dorms. James was waiting up for Remus, sitting on his bed, playing with a Snitch.

"Remus old buddy old pal!" He greeted him warmly, grabbing the boys cloak as he shrugged it off his shoulders and throwing it over a sleeping Peter (who woke with a start but presumed his sleep shortly after).

"Look James, I'm too weak to argue anymore"

"Argue? Why would I want to argue?"

"Don't you remember having a go at me about being in love with my best friend?"

"Oh…yeah…"

"Hey Moony, I thought I was your best friend!"

"I mean best girl-friend Padfoot"

"Yeah that's better!"

"I thought you were my best friend Padfoot!"

"Yeah I am but that doesn't mean I can't be Remus' best friend"

"I thought Peter was Remus' best friend"

"Oh thanks guys!"

"No Professor I don't want to wear the Speedos!" Peter had woken up shouting the odds at the three other boys. Each looking amused they threw in unison three pillows at his head. He fell back against his own pillow and was asleep before he could hit his head against it.

"Anyway, I'm sorry about that Remus, I guess for once I was jealous. You're right; Lily's the only girl who's ever resisted me like this. And it sucks so badly. So there's something I've got to ask you"

"Yes…"

"Will you help me win Lily Evans heart?" He braced himself for a flat out no but instead was extremely relieved by the kind and gentle answer he did receive.

"Of course James, but I'm warning you now, it could take a while. A lot of hard work, determination, and, if you don't mind me saying, a heck of a lot of hair gel"

-----------------------------------------------

"Lily, he's gorgeous"

"Yes but he's an arrogant toe rag"

"I've heard he's a great kisser"

"Heard? You were the one telling everyone!"

"I only kissed him once! But gee was he amazing!"

"Ellie, there is no way in hell that I am going to date him, plus, I like someone else" Lily smiled to herself at the thought of Jeremy, the boy she had spent so long talking to and yet knew so little about.

"Oooh Lily! Who?"

"Jeremy" She smiled again at the name, her eyes glazed over and her eyelashes fluttered.

"Jeremy Huskins?"

"Erm, yeah I think so, I don't even think I asked him for his last name"

"You fancy a 14 year old?"

"No, no Jeremy's not 14, he's 15"

"Jeremy Huskins?"

"Maybe that's not his last name"

"Tall, brown hair, freckles on his nose, brown eyes, strong jaw line, Gryffindor?"

"Maybe there are two Jeremy's…"

"Two Jeremy Huskins?"

"I said that might not be his last name!"

"Ok then, does your Jeremy have a little scar above his left eyebrow?"  
"Why…yes, yes he does"

"Ha-ha you fancy a 14 year old!"

"He told me he was 15!"

"Ha-ha you got lied to by a 14 year old!"

"Ellie!"

"Ok, ok I'm sorry; it's just funny is all. Even dating James Potter is better than dating a 14 year old!"

"I thought dating James Potter was a good thing!"

"Well yes it is, but put it into perspective next to dating a 14 year old and it becomes a brilliant thing"

"Brilliant? You make me laugh Ellie Simpson"

"And you I Lily Evans, and you I" Lily laughed at her friends stupid use of words, she loved this girl.


	4. E

Ok another chapter up.

Hope you like.

Please review.

AWRYT!

Enjoy.

I OWN NO ONE!!!

**'The List'**

James woke up groggily the next morning, he fumbled about on his bedside table for his glasses and propped them against his nose. His legs swung to the side of the bed and he got down. He entered the bathroom, stood in front of the mirror and flexed his muscles.

"You're so vain, you know that Prongs?" James was startled to see Remus also in the reflection of the mirror, "Lily doesn't like vanity"

"Don't you mean vainness?"

"Actually James, I don't" He laughed at the boy's futile attempts to always outsmart him.

"Oh come on Remus, I'm vain, that's just who I am!"

"And personally I don't think you should change that, it's just Lily-"

"I would change anything for Lily"

"How many times do you look in the mirror a day? On average"

"Around…134 times"

"Right…cut it down to 60 ok?"

"But…but that means I could have an incredibly large piece of spinach in my teeth and I wouldn't know for, what? An hour!"

"James, wouldn't someone tell you if you had spinach in your teeth?"

"Would you?" James question was poignant. He was right, Remus wouldn't tell him.

"Still, you'll look into any shiny surface you come across"

"I'm a very self conscious person Remus!"

"Oh yes, and yesterday I flew to England to have tea and scones with the queen"

"And you didn't invite me?" Remus rolled his eyes at the boy, he was funny, but if he really wanted to he could drive you nuts.

Lily and her friend Ellie were busy getting dressed for school. Lily's hair was still wet from her recent shower and the tiny droplets of water at the end of her strands were soaking through her school shirt making it see-through.

"Lily you really ought to sort that out before we leave" Ellie said, pointing at the girl's shirt, which was merely a piece of transparent cloth over her red patterned bra.

Lily looked down at her shirt and then pointed her wand at her hair, she muttered an incantation and her hair instantly dried, it eall down to just below her shoulders where it created small flowing ringlets. However she had not noticed that her shirt was still damp.

"I've got Defence Against the Dark Arts first"

"Great, me too" The girls strolled off to breakfast linking arms. However, they didn't get as far as the portrait hole when they heard a leering voice from behind them.

"Lily dearest" Lily stack out her tongue and mouthed 'kill me' to Ellie before turning around to face her admirer.

"What do you want Potter?"

"I just wanted to tell you that you look err-" James had just noticed Lily's shirt and couldn't help but stare, "I-I-I y-you- nice- v-very nice" He stuttered. Remus rolled his eyes and grabbed Lily by the arm. He brought her to a mirror in the corner of the room and showed her exactly what James was gaping at. She gasped and covered her chest with her arms. Remus waved his wand at her and her shirt dried.

"You pervert Potter!" She squealed at the gob smacked boy.

"No! No I was just going to say how lovely you look today!"

"Yeah and perve on my bra!"

"I wasn't!"

"Oh and I bet I know just what you were thinking!" She was utterly outraged. She grabbed Ellie by the arm and dragged her out of the portrait hall and all the way down to breakfast, ignoring the following "Lily! Lily!" that she was receiving from an incredulous James.

"Smooth James, smooth"

"This is harder than I thought it would be" James said, putting his head in his hands.

"Don't worry; I have a few more tricks up my sleeve to help you win her heart" Remus took him by the arm and lead him to the Great Hall, despite his constant moans and "Oh Lily!" s.

Ellie and Lily were joined by Jessica and Sophie (their two Ravenclaw friends) after breakfast as they walked to DADA together. Ellie laughed about Lily's little accident with James that morning, much to Lily's dismay, and got the other two howling along with her imitations of both James and Lily's facial expressions. Lily managed a small smile herself which was quickly replaced by a frown as she entered the classroom to see all the Marauders standing there in the middle of the room.

Their Professor, Professor Drewbridge stood in front of the four boys, pointing at people to sit down in seats.

"You Potter, over there on that empty desk" He looked around as though not sure who to seat next, finally he clocked eyes on Lily, "Miss Evans, next to Potter".

Lily stood in her spot astounded.

"Sir…sorry sir, I was just wondering if I could sit somewhere different because I-"

"No. Ellie Simpson you sit next to Remus Lupin, Black next to Friar, Pettigrew next to Long, and McIntyre you will be next to…ahh McKenzie"

"But Sir I really-" Lily pleaded.

"Please Miss Evans, I'm having enough trouble as it is with, what, the wife leaving me for an older man and the dog going off and getting itself run over, stupid bitch" With which he added, "I mean the dog not the wife". James looked at Lily with delight and patted the chair next to him, signalling for her to come and sit down. She winced and parted from her friends, walking slowly to the chair as though it was her death march. She wiped down the seat with her hand and sat down on it, making sure she kept as much away from Potter as possible. She was balancing on the edge of her seat and nearly fell off with surprise when James asked how her day was going so far.

"What's it to you?" She asked, eyeballing him suspiciously.

"I was just wondering"

"Well, I got perved on this morning by an utter freak and now I have to spend all of my Defence Against the Dark Arts lessons with him, so right now my day is looking pretty shite thanks" James looked down, stung by her answer. He couldn't actually understand why she was so horrible to him.

"Oh, ok I understand" She looked at him in the face and did a double take; did she just see a look of _hurt_ on James Potter's face?

"Oh James I wasn't trying to offend you I-"

"You just succeeded right?" He asked her, shaking his head slightly. He looked away from her but she kept looking at him. Why all of a sudden did she feel sympathy for him? For the boy she hated.

"Miss Evans will you and Mr Potter please stop having a love-off session in my classroom, just because you still have those young burning flames doesn't mean the rest of us do" He said in a bitter tone, slamming a picture of his wife face-down on his desk.

"Me and Evans having a love-off session? Fat chance Professor" James snorted.

"Sir, I don't believe that talking about Potter and Evans love life is in the curriculum" A particularly nasty looking Slytherin said, giving each of them a distasteful look in turn.

"Yes, yes you're right Mr Tattler; let us get on with our work hmm"

James and Lily continued to ignore each other throughout the whole lesson of learning about Grindylows and Hinkypunks. Lily didn't know why this bothered her so much but there was something there deep inside her that was really uncomfortable with this new arrangement of blanking. When the lesson was over James gathered his things together without another word and hurried off to meet Sirius where they walked to Transfiguration together.

"Hey Lily, how was the lesson with Potter?" Ellie asked her as they also walked to Transfiguration.

"Strange…I don't think he likes me any more"

"Oh come off it Lily, he's insanely in love with you"

"I dunno…not any more" Lily registered as Severus walked past her, she hadn't spoken to him since sometime in the Summer holidays and made the mental note to catch him on his own later and have a quick catch up.

"Ahh old McGonagall now, watch she doesn't turn into anything you wouldn't expect, like a…really cute boy or something!" Ellie gasped. Lily laughed at her friend and entered the classroom. Professor McGonagall was facing the board and writing down some new spells on the board. Lily realised that all of the Marauders were at the back of the classroom on desks next to each other. When Remus caught her eye he gave her a smile but when James realised she was looking he burst into laughter and whispered something to Sirius. Lily went bright red and looked away.

"Now class, as you are now 6th years I trust your judgement to choose where you seat yourselves, however I do expect complete and full attention from each one of you in my lessons and any misbehaviour will ultimately result in your moving of either desks, or of this classroom. Is that understood 6th years?" A chorus of 'Yes Professor McGonagall' pursued her and she nodded for them all to take a seat. Lily made sure she sat as far away from the Marauders as possible, bringing Ellie along with her.

"Now today we will be transforming metals, some metals are easier to transform than others, and some metals are nigh impossible to transform, for example, gold. There is only one substance that can transform a metal into gold, but I think that's for your Defence Against the Dark Arts teacher to tell you about. Now will you all get out your books, quills, and some parchment and copy off the board" As soon as she had finished speaking a scream from outside the door was heard, making her jump in fright, "Students I need to go and attend to what that was, I expect all of you to be finished when I return, so get to work" She hurried out of the classroom and the class heard her gasp as the door swung shut on its hinges.

"This is boring!" Sirius sighed loudly as though everyone would want to hear what he was saying.

"You're boring" Ellie said to him with distaste.

"Says who Simpson?"

"Says me, just now Black" They glared at each other with intent. Lily reckoned they might fancy each other, but their silly arguments were just getting too silly to handle.

"Oh grow up you two" Remus murmured, still scratching away at his parchment with his quill.

"You grow up!" Sirius snapped back in his defence.

"I have done!"

"Yeah well…yeah!" Remus shook his head and went back to doing his work. Lily made sure to keep out of this little confrontation, she scribbled down the remainder of what was on the board. McGonagall was still nowhere to be seen. Something soft but thrown with force hit her on the back of the head, she bent over to pick it up from the floor and found a ball of parchment; she opened it and smoothed out the creases. On it was a bewitched (making it move) picture of her and James kissing, she felt something inside her leap with pleasure, but she tried to control an outwards smile. Why was she feeling like this all of a sudden? She turned round look at James, maybe even smile at him but she was greeted instead with the wink of Sirius Black, who was pointing at the parchment in her hand and doing thumbs up. Her stomach dropped, it was only Black messing around. She stared at James bent down her head for exactly 23 seconds, holding her breath. She realised that her attempts were futile and decided to stop hoping he looked at her. Once she had turned back round James finally looked at her. He frowned, Remus' new suggestion of ignoring her didn't seem to be working at all, in fact it seemed to be pushing her away further. He ought to try a new approach, Remus said she likes being talked to like a normal person, but James had never spoken to a girl like a normal person before, except maybe his mum.


	5. S

EXTRA LONG CHAPTER TODAY!

OK SO FINALLY 'THE LIST'

HOPE U LIKE.

DO ENJOY.

I OWN NO ONE!!!

REVIEW MEEEEEEE!!! thnx

**'The List'**

"Lily, why are you being so quiet?" Ellie asked her, scanning her face for an answer. It had been 30 minutes since McGonagall had left, so Lily took the opportunity to read up on today's lesson in her book.

"Hmm" She mumbled, not taking her eyes from 'Transfiguration Today (for the Modern Witch and Wizard)'.

"Never mind" her friend sighed, also flicking through her pages.

"Hey Remus, you know you told me to ignore Lily, see if it winds her up? Well I don't think it's working"

"Trust me James, I ignored her for a whole weekend once because she told her friend Jessica that I fancied her, she's never wanted to talk to me so much in her life"

"Well…maybe, because she's so used to ignoring me anyway, she doesn't find it any different"

"I dunno James…"

"I'm going to try doing that thing you told me, you know, talking to her like a normal person"

"Oh good"

"I just have one teensy weensy problem"

"What's that?"

"I don't know how to do it" Remus shook his head again in pity. He began to scribble something down on a spare piece of parchment. James read over his shoulder 'The List', "What's 'The List'?"

"This list is going to give you everything you need to make her fall madly in love with you, it will provide you with ways to grab her attention, things to talk to her about, small little insignificant details about her life that will mean everything to her if you know about, this James, is the list that will win you Lily Evans, this list, will be the list you will _live_ by"

"Wow, give it here!"

"It's not finished yet you dingbat, I've only just started"

"But what do I do for now?"

"Keep ignoring her"

"But it's so hard!"

"Just do it Prongs"

To the classes surprise a silvery object which they identified as a cat came pouncing into the classroom straight through the wall. They thought it might have been a ghost but many recognised it as a Patronus.

"It's McGonagall's" Lily whispered.

"How can you tell?" Sirius asked.

"Because her animagus is a cat you moron"

"Shut up Simpson"

"Oh boo hoo don't make me cry Black"

"Just shut up both of you!" James screamed, they looked quite taken aback, "Listen to the goddamn cat". The cat opened its mouth and out came the voice of their Professor.

"I want an essay on 'why transfiguring metals is so helpful in today's industry' in by next lesson, use pages 345 – 347 to help you, Class is dismissed" A cheer erupted from the students.

"But we still have 20 minutes till the lessons over!" Remus said flabbergasted, to which everyone turned round and lobbed balls of parchment at him, "which is awesome!" he added weakly. Lily laughed at her friend and winked at him. James noticed this and jealousy bubbled up inside him.

"Don't worry James, you can have her" he assured him, patting him on the shoulder.

"You can have her" he mimicked. The class gathered their belongings and left the classroom. With 20 minutes left till lunch they had nothing to do. Friends separated off from the rest of the class into different directions, Lily and Ellie decided to go off into the courtyard. Much to their dismay the Marauders decided to follow.

"Hey Simpson your laces are untied" Sirius shouted at her. She rolled her eyes, the fact that her shoes had no laces made his attempt at making her look down pathetic, however she tripped up and had to grab onto Lily's skirt, which she pulled down with her, because miraculously all of a sudden she had laces on her shoes, which were in fact untied. Lily screamed and pulled up her skirt, she was so glad that she had her cloak to cover her; this didn't stop the Marauders howling with laughter though.

"You're disgusting!" Lily screamed at them.

"Oh write a book about it Evans" Sirius laughed.

"You pig!" Sirius snorted in reply.

"Next time, why don't you forget to wear a cloak?" Sirius winked at her. James laughed but found himself feeling sorry for her, he didn't know why though; it was normally him that would torture her like this.

"I can't believe you find this funny Remus!" Ellie shouted at him.

"I'm sorry it was just the look on your faces"

"Typical boys!" Ellie said loudly, "Can't live with them, can't hex them into the next Millennium" She stormed off with Lily in pursuit.

"We are too bad!" Remus said to them, still in hysterics.

"Look who's laughing now Moony, I thought we were too cruel!"

"Ok, sometimes I just have to laugh, I mean, when you target more than one person it becomes funnier"

"Why do you always flirt with her Sirius?"

"Who Simpson? I don't flirt with her…" He trailed off.

"I meant Lily"

"You're having a bubble aren't you James?"

"No…you always wink at her"  
"I wink at your mum too, doesn't mean I want her in bed does it!" James turned a bright shade of crimson, Peter burst into a fresh fit of giggles.

"Maybe she fancies you"

"Who doesn't James?" Sirius asked pointedly.

"Don't listen to him James, Lily would have to be 100 times dumber to fancy Sirius instead of you"

"Oh thanks Remus!"

"Go lick a cauldron" The three remaining Marauders laughed at Sirius, who folded his arms in a strop and stomped off into the courtyard.

"I can't believe that little toad tripped me up" Ellie fumed, cutting the laces off her shoes.

"I can't believe you pulled down my skirt in front of them!"

"It wasn't my fault! At least you had your cloak covering you; I had nothing to hide my beetroot face"

"What a pair we are eh?" Lily laughed. Ellie smiled up at her best friend.

"Lunchtime!" Ellie said happily, throwing the last bit of lace in the bin, "There you go, good as new" They strolled off to lunch.

"Is my list finished yet Moony?"

"What list?"

"'The List' Padfoot"

"Ok then what's 'The List'?"

"'The List' is possibly the only list that will get Lily Evans in my arms where she belongs"

"Ha-ha!"

"What's so funny?"

"You're getting girl advice off Remus. You could have just asked me"

"If I treated Lily how you treat girls then I might only have one eye"

"Why one eye?"

"Because she would have scratched the other one out"

"It always seems to work for me"

"The girls you go for have an IQ the same as the size of their feet"

"Yeah, but they're the best in bikinis"

"Lily's right, you're disgusting" James said, Sirius laughed and panted like a dog.

"…and then we got let out of class 20 minutes early" Lily was recalling to one of their Gryffindor friends, Samantha, who shared a dorm with them.

"So when did Sirius pull your skirt down?"  
"No Ellie pulled my skirt down because Sirius tripped her"

"What a bully"

"You don't say- don't look now but here they come" Ellie said, looking down at her plate of spaghetti.

"Hi Lily" James said eagerly. Lily's heart fluttered but she put it down to indigestion.

"Hi…James" James beamed at the way she called him James.

"She means Potter" Ellie sneered at him, pulling Lily away from his gaze. James smile turned to a frown. Sirius laughed but received himself a glare from Ellie; he attempted to glare back but was laughing too hard to achieve anything.

"You're making it smell around here Black, go away" She said shooing him off.

"Want to go to Hogsmeade with me this Saturday?" He asked her.

"Why on _earth_ would I want to do that to myself?"

"I have absolutely no idea"

"No Black, I wouldn't like to go to Hogsmeade with you this Saturday" She said sounding resigned.

"Oh well it was worth a try, what about you Samantha?" Ellie looked at him incredulously.

"No thanks Black, I don't think my boyfriend would like it" She said pointing to a particularly tonk looking boy sitting at the Ravenclaw table, flexing his muscles which were as big as Sirius himself.

"Oh, right, yeah better not tell him about this" Sirius said quickly, hurrying off down the hall.

"Bye Lily" James said dreamily.

"Bye" She replied with a small wave.

"So now you like him do you?" Ellie asked her slapping her on the shoulder.

"Who said I liked him?" She blushed and looked away.

"Bye James" She mimicked, flicking her hair over her shoulder.

"I didn't say it like that"

"Whatever, Lily, I say go for it but if you don't wanna then…"  
"No, I don't wanna actually" She said, focussing her attention on her tuna and mayonnaise sandwich.

"You are so difficult child" Ellie sighed.

Lily had Potions next, the one subject that Ellie didn't join her in taking. She was upset to hear that all four Marauders were also taking this subject, and that Samantha, Jessica and Sophie all took it at a different time to her. This left her on her own.

"James, I think I've finally finished 'The List'"

"'The List'!" James cried out in exasperation. He grabbed the parchment from his friend's hands and read it hungrily. He cleared his throat to read it out loud, they were alone for the minute, no one else had arrived to class yet and Slughorn was no where to be seen.

"'_ Created by Remus Lupin, a copyright product of Marauder Merchandise. _

_**How to win the heart of Lily Evans in ten easy steps**_

_**Step number 1)**_**Complimenting a girl. **_This is where you begin your attempts to win Lily Evans. Lily will feel a million dollars if you are to compliment her regularly. She will show signs of gratitude in the forms of 'fluttering eyelashes', 'gentle hand movements', 'unforced smiles' (this is where she shows all of her teeth), 'return compliments' and 'not throwing anything at you'. If you are to receive any of these reactions you may carry on with the compliments, if you do not however, it is better to back away now with all body limbs in tact, Lily Evans can sometimes resemble a Hippogriff in her actions._

_**Step number 2) **_**Showing common interest in a girl**._ Lily will appreciate you taking an interest in her life. Asking her what cup size her bra is will not be appreciated by said forth, however asking her how her pet hamster, 'Hamlet', is will most probably spark a decent (however short) conversation. She likes to think that taking her to bed is not the only intention you have with her. Using phrases like 'and how do you feel about that?', 'so that's why you're so wonderfully skilled in that particular subject' and 'what do you think Lily?' will earn you extra brownie points. Phrases like 'so which side of the family is your ginger hair from?', 'how's your sister Petunia doing?' and 'don't worry Lily, I'm sure everyone has a weakness, just happens that you're a crap flier', will receive you either a kick in the crotch or a slap around the face. NB: Best to avoid these._

_**Step number 3)**_** Ignoring a girl to get her to notice you. **_Once you have shown Lily that you have begun to take an interest in her now is your time to change tactics. __It has been proven that Lily Evans does not appreciate being ignored. She will try her hardest to gain someone's attention if their intention is to not receive it. If you are ignoring Lily she will make little noises under her breath such as 'ooh' and 'ahh'. Do not be alarmed by these noises, these simply show that a clock inside her head is ticking as she thinks of the next best way to stop you from ignoring her. She will stare at you for minutes on end without blinking until you look at her. If you do not look at her for at least 2 minutes she will hold her breath for exactly 23 seconds, this shows that you ignoring her is really getting to her. If you are in anticipation that she will fall in love with you then this is a major step in your procedure. She will not appreciate you messing her around however. If you decide to use the ignoring tactics then you must, I repeat MUST, stick to them until you have achieved your goal, do not keep switching back and forth to compliments and blanking. Lily hates nothing worse than someone who lies, deceits or messes her around._

_**Step number 4) **_**Making a girl paranoid. **_This is a good way to emphasise your ignorance towards Lily. Although this seems to be the harshest way to win a girls heart it seems to be one of the most effective. A girls pride is something she cherishes beyond most things. Well, at least a girl like Lily Evans. Looking at her and smiling can give her comfort, however looking at her and laughing can drive her crazy. She will become so self conscious that she will not want to talk or look at anyone. This can be used to your advantage. If Lily believes that something is wrong with her you can put __**Step number 1 **__(see line 5) into action. Compliment her like you have never complimented a girl before, she will take any compliment you throw at her, you may even receive a few yourself, however don't be disheartened if you don't. After all, she believes it is all about her. Here are a few full proof compliments you can use to your effect: 'Wow, your hair looks amazing today, then again, it always does', 'you know, I've never seen eyes quite like yours, no one else compares really, they're just so beautiful' and 'you're so clever Lily, I wish I could be as clever as you, I bet your parents are so proud'. Just remember to steer clear of cheesy chat up lines like: 'hey, I've lost my number, can I have yours?', 'hey, do your feet hurt? Because you've been running through my mind _all _night' and 'hey baby, did it hurt when you fell from heaven' and whatever you do avoid, at all costs, the infamous 'hey, have you lost weight?' This will most probably be the last thing you ever say._

_**Step number 5 **_**Getting a girl to trust you. **_It will take a long time to get Lily Evans to trust you. This is because trust does not come as easily to some as others, Lily is one of those people who has to scrutinize everyone before she can decide whether or not they are friend or foe. She is far from judgemental, however she still finds it hard to trust (it's your fault for being in love with such a complex sort of girl). As she has already decided that you are swine it may take longer for you to persuade her otherwise. A good place to start is telling her one of your own secrets. This shows that you trust her with your secrets. It is better to tell her something small though because there is no guarantee that she won't tell someone else. Once she has realised that you seriously trust her she will become more flexible about trusting you. It will also provide her with leverage, example, if you tell people about Lily's secret it is now in her power to tell people about yours. A serious note on this occasion: Remember to NOT TELL ANYONE LILY'S SECRET, she will never ever trust you this way._

_**Step number 6 **_**Touching a girl (in a none provocative way). **_Girls are very touchy feely, Lily often enjoys touching me on the hand or arm. This shows that she trusts me (to find out how to make Lily trust you see __**Step number 5**__). If Lily trusts you then she will most probably touch you in the same way. Hugging is one of her favourites. Touching her lightly on the arm just above the elbow is a good way to make her feel more comfortable around you. This is not intruding in her personal space and it is not making her think that you want to be 'more than friends'. If you touch her somewhere that she is not comfortable with you touching you will repel her as instantly as Snape repels shampoo. You will be able to tell if she is uncomfortable because her eyes will flash dangerously or you will feel a sharp pain sear through your body as her fist comes into contact with your stomach._

_**Step number 7 **_**Suggesting to a girl that you spend time together. **_Now that Lily Evans trusts you, (if Lily still does not trust you reread and apply __**Step numbers 5**__ and __**6**__), you can suggest spending some quality bonding time together. Do not be too forward about this; this only gives her a reason to humiliate you. Drop subtle hints such as 'so Hogsmeade is coming up this Saturday' and 'oh you have a free period next too, so do I' these show that you have not targeted her specifically, it just happened by coincidence that you both have free time to spend that could be spent together. It is unlikely that she will ever ask to spend time with you, if this does happen however act cool and casual, she will not find it sophisticated if you do 'the dance' in front of her. This might embarrass her and she could reclaim her invitation. _

_**Step number 8 **_**Spending time with a girl. **_Once you have suggested spending time with Lily and she has cordially agreed you cannot mess things up. Unless she is under the impression that you are on a 'date' it is vital that you do not mention the word. This will only freak her out. Also, if you are just 'hanging out' as 'friends' then you should not make a big hoo-ha out of it. A nice single rose may be a munificent token but chocolates, flowers and a multi-lingual teddy bear that says 'I Love You' in 16 different languages (including Kentish) is going over board. She will catch on that your intentions are more than just 'friendly' and will leave you broken hearted. Here is the time to implement __**Step numbers 1, 2 **__and__** 6**__. Compliments will make her feel special whilst on your 'get together' and will give her a reason to stay. Touching her in the right places (by right I don't mean what Sirius would think right) will make her feel safe and secure with you, this is a definite turn on for girls, a man that can make them feel like the world couldn't touch them. Then you must put into effect __**Step number 2**__! You cannot spend the whole time complimenting her and touching her arm, you must be able to talk to her! Ask her questions about her life, DON'T RELATE EVERYTHING SHE SAYS TO YOURSELF! If she says something along the lines of 'oh enough about me, what about you?' reply by saying 'but you're so much more interesting than me!' and _then _carry on with talking about yourself. This shows that you considered whether or not to talk about yourself before actually going ahead with it. This shows humbleness, a real attraction in Lily's eyes. And remember kissing on a first 'date' or whatever you want to call it is strictly forbidden! She will find you pushy and lustful. It will also make her more respectful of herself. This will make her happier to be with you. By the end of the first gathering you will hopefully have had time to arrange a second one. If she has not given you the chance then this could be a bad sign. If she ends the date with the phrase 'see you around' she has had an awful time and does not actually want to see you around. If she ends it with 'I've had a nice time' it's been ok but not by any means her best and if she ends it with 'I'll owl you' it means that she never will. If you leave her hanging like in __**Step number 3 **__she will want you more, and if she leaves you hanging she either doesn't want another date or she wants to have the same effect on you as you are hoping to have on her (the latter of these shows great progress). These are very dark waters and events could go either way, so you will just have to make sure she enjoys spending time with you. I have mentioned all of the ways she can reject you however I have not told you the ways in which she will imply a second date is in order. This is because she will say nothing; her eyes will say it all, so remember to look into them as she leaves. Sparkling eyes are always a good sign._

_**Step number 9 **_**Asking a girl out. **_Now is the time you have been waiting for, now is the time to ask Lily Evans to be your girlfriend. You must only initiate this step when you have been on _at least _three proper dates (this does not include 'study dates' or lunches in the Great Hall). You must get your wording perfect so as to not scare her away or make her laugh abruptly in your face, bounce off, and tell all of her friends about what a ponce you are. It is better to ask her out on a date, (this can include your third date, remember no study dates or lunches!), this means that she is happily spending time with you and is not in the middle of a 5 foot long Potions essay on different types of wild fungi and why some are better in soups than others. 'Lily, I love spending time with you, you're all I think about, you're all I eat, sleep, drink and dream, I can't stand the thought of not being with you and it makes me want to kill myself when we are apart' will make her run off screaming in terror, this could also result in your one way ticket to either St Mungos or Azkaban. Not good. You should be careful to not include too much detail about how much you love her, keep it sweet and simple, a small compliment will suffice 'Lily, it's been so great spending time with you, you're so beautiful and you make me feel like the luckiest man alive when I'm with you, please would you consider being my girlfriend' The use of the word 'consider' here means that she has a choice. Giving her a choice is definitely the right way to go. She does not feel pressured, yet she feels obliged. This is the most important part of 'The List', this is not a simple date you are asking her for, this is the real balooza, this is you asking her to be your girlfriend! (Remember to contain yourself from doing the dance if she says yes, she still has the chance to dump your ass!)._

_**Step number 10 **_**How to initiate and carry out the first kiss. **_9 out of 10 girls say that the first kiss gives you everything you need to know about a boy. The same applies for Lily Evans. If you get the first kiss wrong (this can include too much tongue, too little tongue, no tongue at all and biting) then you're pretty much damned for the rest of your relationship. A girl likes to remember her first kiss like she will remember her wedding, her first pet, and in Lily's case her first O in a Charms assignment. You must make it perfect. Perfect scenario, perfect day, perfect breath. Extra tic-tacs will come in handy here. No eye contact can be made during the kiss; you must keep your eyes closed no matter how much you want to open them. This will freak her out and it will also give her the chance to see how strange you look when you kiss. Never and I repeat NEVER tell her she looks funny when she kisses, even if she looks like a goldfish giving a camel mouth to mouth resuscitation. She will not thank you for it and it could make her think twice about kissing you again. Remember to tell her how good she is at kissing, but don't ask her how she got so good. This shows jealousy which is weakness and it also shows untrustworthiness. _

_**If you can perfect all of the above steps then you are most definitely going to have Lily Evans in your arms. It is all a matter of patience, accuracy and faith. **_

_**P.S. Oh and James, do something with your hair. She absolutely despises that thing you do to mess it up.**_

_**P.P.S Her favourite things include: school, books, lilies, sweets, her prefect badge, eating food, cooking food, smelling food and talking about food. **_

_**Her dislikes include: Sirius Black, teachers that mark her down because she so blatantly outsmarts them and this makes them think she's a threat and that she'll take their jobs, bullies, people who take food from her, people who call her greedy, anorexic people who don't like food and you (but I'm sure we can change the last one).**__"_

"Wow Remus…that's one long list"

"It's not _a_ list Sirius it's 'The List'".

"I don't appreciate myself being one of Evans dislikes much" Sirius said with a huff.

"Don't take it to heart Padfoot"

"Well maybe sometimes I do" People had finally started filing into the classroom and he sat down on his chair to sulk.

"I think I've put steps 1, 2, 3 and 4 efficiently into practise, don't you?"

"Oh that was just a starter James, from now on you will live, breathe, sleep and dream 'The List'"

"Right, live, sleep and eat the list, got it!"

"No James I didn't say eat I said…oh never mind" Remus sat down in his seat.


	6. L

Ok sorry it's late.

I own no one.

Hope you enjoy.

Help i have writers block.

PLEASE REVIEW CUS THEY MAKE ME SMILE!!!

xxxx

Thanks.

**"The List"**

"Hey Lily"

"Hi James…" Lily said cautiously. She was on her own, so she might as well attempt to make some friends, even if it is with _them_. James looked down briefly at 'The List' before addressing her.

"Wow, your hair looks amazing today, then again, it always does" He registered her face, no signs of fluttering eyelashes…no signs of gentle hand movements, no return compliments…well at least she didn't throw anything at him…wait, could that really be…an unforced smile!?

"Thank you James" James punched the air with triumph when she had looked away and sat down in the seat in front of him.

"Jus l'amore, translated into Juice of love" Slughorn had appeared at what Lily thought as out of nowhere, "We will be making over the next few weeks the Juice of love. Your homework assignments will be to research and write about it and your class assignments will be to make it. As you're a bunch of miscreants I will put you into partners" He smiled, "so who should I pick first…hmmm, Evans and Black, Potter and Snape, Lupin and Reindeers…"

"No!" Lily groaned.

"Feck, arse, bugger" James moaned. He was hoping to get Lily as a partner, and if not Lily then at least someone he didn't despise.

"Evans, I guess we're partners then" Sirius said, smiling suggestively at her.

"Don't touch me or I'll appeal for a restraining order" She hissed, pulling her seat away from him.

"The ingredients are on the board, you should know by now were all of the equipment is, you have an hour to get started, begin" Slughorn flicked his wand and in front of each pair appeared a small cauldron.

"I'll get the ingredients" Lily said harshly. She got up and walked over to the cupboards. James took his chance and hurried over to her.

"Hey Lily, do you know which leech will produce a better texture for the potion?"

"Yeah use a really fat one, they're less grainy"

"You're so clever Lily, I wish I could be as clever as you, I bet your parents are so proud" James recited perfectly from 'The List'.

"Err, thanks Potter" He saw her stroking the side of her face with her hand…gently, he had done it again, she had given him gentle hand movements!

"I think Potions will be really great this year, what, with harder work and smaller classes. What do you think Lily?"

"You're asking me what _I _think?"

"Yes, why is that so weird?"

"Because you never ask me what _I_ think, it's always about what _you_ think"

"Well I guess I've had a change of heart"

"Yeah, I reckon it will be great, except I've got Black as a partner, no offence because he's your best friend and all"

"No that's ok, how's your hamster Hamlet?"

"How do you know about Hamlet?" She asked him suspiciously.

"Remus told me about him, I thought maybe you would like to talk about him"

"He's great thanks; he's just had his third birthday! Mum sent me a picture; I can show you later if you like!" She said excitedly. Everything was going so great!

"Ok then! It's a d-" He bit his tongue, remembering not to say the'd' word.

"It's a…"

"Dragon! Over there!" She spun around to see absolutely nothing.

"Oh sorry, my glasses were dusty, it was only McIntyre" He smiled weakly. She gave him a strange look, shook her head and walked away with her arms full of ingredients and supplies.

"Stupid James" He muttered to himself, walking back to Snape with the ingredients.

"Stupid Potter, they're the ingredients for a fenix felis potion" Snape drawled with amusement in his eyes.  
"In that case Snivellus, you can get them next time" And he dropped the things into his arms, "off you go then" he said shooing him in the direction of the cupboards. He glared at him and stormed off to get the right ingredients.

"So Lily, do you have a boyfriend?"

"Black if you ask me out I am going to jump through the window"

"Nooo, no not for me"

"Well then no…wait who's it for?"

"James"

"Oh in that case yeah I do" She said slicing up some leeches and dropping them into their boiling cauldron.

"Now Lily, play fair, James is a great guy"

"And so is Dumbledore, but I don't want to go on a date with him"

"Older men not your thing eh Evans?" He winked.

"Don't wink at me; I hate it when you wink at me"

"Why?"

"Because my Aunt Mildred only has one eye and she finds it offensive when people wink" Sirius kept quiet after this comment and helped stir the mixture while she continued adding ingredients.

"Ok pack up and label your cauldrons, you can leave now" Slughorn said lazily, waving an arm as dismissal.

"Hey Lily, Lily!" James was running to catch up with her; however she had realised this and decided to run faster. She had a free period next in which she could get away from the Marauders and study, "Lily, finally, you didn't seem to hear me calling you" James said when he had finally caught up with her on the stairs.  
"Yes I did" She muttered under her breath.

"What was that?"

"Oh nothing, what do you want James?"

"Where are you off to now?"

"Gryffindor Common room if you must know"

"Oh you have a free period next too, so do I"

"Potter, are you stalking me?"

"What?"

"I mean, why have you taken all of the same lessons as me?"

"I didn't"

"Potions, Transfiguration, Defence Against the Dark Arts"

"I want to be an Auror"

"No you don't" She said, dismissing the matter.

"Yes I do…"

"I want to be an Auror"

"Really?" He asked her excitedly.

"Yes, I've wanted to be one ever since I heard about the uprising"

"Wow, we have something in common"

"Hmm, are you _sure_ you want to be an Auror?"

"I think I would know" James said getting slightly agitated.

"Hmm…anyway, I best be going now, I'm going to do my Transfiguration homework"

"I'll come with you"

"Hmm…sure you're not going to prank me, or distract me or, god forbid, kiss me?" James slapped himself mentally, he forgot to make sure she trusted him enough to spend alone time with him.

"Yeah I'm sure"

"Hmm…"

"Lily will you please stop 'Hmm-ing' me?"

"Ok Potter you can come with me, but any funny business and I'll hex you so badly your mother, father and cousin Victor will feel it"

"How did you know I had a cousin called Victor?" James eyeballed her suspiciously.

"The same way you knew I had a hamster called Hamlet" She said and then she flounced off up the stairs with James at her heel.

Once Lily was settled down by the fireplace in the Gryffindor Common room she got out her books and began to read through her text book again. She unrolled a scroll of parchment and titled and dated it. James sat watching her with intent.

"Potter you're distracting me" Lily said, not taking her eyes from her parchment.

"Oh right" James said hurriedly. He got out his own parchment, book and quill and started to also scribble down a few paragraphs. He was a bit pissed actually, before 'The List' he thought he was doing fine. Well, fair. Ok, crap, but at least he was making progress. She did call him by his first name after all didn't she? All he was doing was repeating himself, why should it work any different this time?

"Wow James you work quickly" Lily said looking down at his parchment.

"Eh? Oh yeah, I like Transfiguration"

"Why?"

"Ahh Lily my dear, if I told you that, I would have to kiss you"

"You're right, don't tell me" She laughed. James made an excuse to bend over and have a quick look at 'The List' it didn't say anything about her laughing at his jokes. What should he say now?

"So that's why you're so wonderfully skilled in that particular subject" He mumbled.

"Huh?"

"I…err…never mind" He was getting tongue tied, what else did it say on 'The List'?

"James are you ok?" She asked him. Was it time to ignore her?

"I've got to go" He collected up his things and fumbled upstairs.

Lily's heart gave an extra beat. What had just happened? Was Potter ignoring her again? Wait, why did she even care, she didn't like him so him ignoring her wasn't bad. Was it? She finished off her essay and put her things back in her bag. As Potions was her last lesson of the day she now had some free time to laze about, take a rest, she even considered going down to the lake to paddle her feet.


	7. O

LATE SORRY!

HOPE U LIKE!  
REVIEW PLEASE IT'S FUN TO READ!!!

Enjoy.

**"The List"**

"James mate you look like you've just seen a ghost, the bloody baron given you a fright again eh? Ha-ha" Sirius laughed when he entered the dorm.

"I'm ignoring Lily"

"Why? Did she spit on your mum?"

"It's step number 3 on 'The List'"

"You're actually doing the stuff on that stupid list?"

"Remus knows Lily better than anyone else"

"James, when was Remus' last girlfriend?"

"I dunno…Jenny Higgins in third year I suppose…"

"And how old are we now?"

"6th year"

"And what does that tell you?"

"That Jenny Higgins is blind?"

"No, it tells us to not trust Remus!"

"That's not very nice"

"Love isn't very nice James"

"Lily's love is, it's the best thing in the world"

"You're such a puff! You're going to get beaten up!"

"You're just jealous"

"Oh yeah, jealous that the girl I'm in love with wants nothing to do with me"

"You fancy Ellie"

"I do not fancy Ellie"

"You do!"

"Prove it"

"I can't"

"Innocent until proven guilty mate"

"Guilty until proven innocent buddy!"

"You're pathetic"

"Oh go cry me a river"

"Go jump in a river"

"Go play with your mum"

"Do WHAT with my mum!"

"I dunno…play chess"

"Eff you James"

"Eff you Sirius"

"Fine"

"Fine" And the two boys stormed off in different directions, however they only got as far as Sirius' bed post before realising they both wanted to stay in the same place.

"I think _you_ should leave"

"I was here first!"

"That's why you should leave; it's my turn to be in the dorm"

"We'll flip for it"

"Flip yourself"

"Fine then, you leave"

"Get out"

"That's not what your mum was saying last night"

"Stop talking about my mum!"

"You're right she's not worth it"

"My mums twice the woman your mum will ever be!"

"You mean twice the man"

"Don't say that about my mum"

"It's not her fault, I'm sure all women start growing moustaches when they reach her age. How old is she now? 85?"

"You little!" Sirius made to grab at James' neck but he ducked and Sirius got a fist full of curtain draping over his four poster bed.

"Catch me if you can OLD MAN!" James ran out of the dorm and down the stairs, stumbling a few times but carrying on anyway.

"Come back here Potter!" Sirius screamed, slipping on the fifth to last step and tumbling down, his cloak flying over his head and encasing him in a black ball on the floor. Muffled screams were heard from beneath the fabric but James didn't stay long enough to find out what they were saying. As he made a run for the portrait he knocked Lily's friend Ellie over and she fell back, over the arm rest, and landed, sprawled onto the sofa.

"Sorry!" He shouted at her as he opened the portrait hole and climbed through it. He realised once he was outside and nearing the lake that he was far away from Sirius and he wasn't following. He stopped running, out of breath, and slid down a tree, gasping in the fresh air.

"James?" He looked up; there in front of him was Lily Evans in all her glory, "are you ok?"

"I have to go" He said remembering that he was supposed to be ignoring her. He got up and with the rest of his energy, which wasn't a lot, he hobbled back to the castle.

"But James!" Lily was befuddled, two hours prior to this they were getting on fine, she was even considering taking him off her 'dislikes' list.

"Potter there you are!" Sirius shouted across the courtyard as James was slowly creeping back to the school; he was so worn out from avoiding both Sirius and Lily that he was resigned to crawling on his hands and knees. When he saw Sirius in the distance, pointing a finger at him, he quickly turned around and crawled back the other way.

"You, stay where you are!" He was screaming after him.

"Sorry Sirius, I have an appointment to make"

"POTTER!" This was enough for James; he got up from the floor and staggered away before he could be hexed into the next millennium.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------

"Ellie, something strange is happening, I am being ignored by Potter"

"I thought that would be a good thing"  
"Yeah of course…of course" Lily said quickly, "But still…I don't know why"

"Did you do anything mean to him?"

"No"

"Well…that is strange"

"So what do you think I should do about it?"

"I dunno…why do you want to do anything about it?"

"Oh I don't it's just…you know"

"Lily…are you upset that Potter is ignoring you?"

"I just don't like being ignored is all"

"Hmm, I think you might like him"

"Ha! Me? Like Potter? You must be Potty!" Lily laughed in a strained sort of way.

"That laugh is so fake!" Ellie squealed, "You fancy Potter!"

"No I don't!" Lily shouted at her friend.

"Geez Lily no need to go psycho on me I was only having a laugh!"

"Well it wasn't funny. I don't fancy Potter; he's just being a dick. He's already ignored me once today and now he's doing it again. It's starting to get on my nerves, like he's following some kind of list that tells him just how to wind me up"

"Don't be silly Lily, why would James be following some kind of list? He can get girls fine without one"

"Well maybe I'm different aren't I? And I never said anything about the list being to get me"

"Look Lily, if Potter continues to ignore you then why don't you just ignore him back?"

"Huh?"

"Act like you don't give a damn, look away when he looks at you, laugh at him like he has some giant spider crawling along his shoulder when in fact there's nothing there. Ruffle his feathers a bit, you know"

"Now Ellie, that's just mean, that's like manipulating someone"

"Oh you're too soft Lily; it's a fool proof way to get him to like you again"

"I DON'T LIKE HIM!"

"So…I just thought you liked the attention"

"Oh yeah, Attention…I like that"

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------

"Remus…Remus!" James was cowering in a dark corner between their Charms classroom and an empty broom cupboard on the fourth floor. Remus was walking casually through the corridor but stopped abruptly when he heard his name being called, "It's me, James"

"James?" Remus inquired, squinting his eyes in the dark, attempting to catch a glimpse of him.

"Is Sirius around?"

"James, what's going on?"

"I said is Sirius around?" James asked anxiously.

"No he's not, but why are you hiding in there James, you should really come out, if someone walks by and sees you they could think you're a peeping Tom or something"

"Ha, peeping Tom!" James laughed, "I got accused of being one of those last week"

"Why?"

"I watched the next door neighbour get changed each night"

"That's quite sick!"

"Nah she was gorgeous!"

"Just shut up James and come out"

"I'm not leaving until I know I'm safe!"

"What did you do James?"

"I…er…insulted Sirius' mum"

"Again?"

"Oh come on he insults my mum all the time!"

"Not really…"

"Well when he does, it really stings. At least his mums an old bag with a layer of hair in every place you wouldn't expect to find it, oh and with that weird crooked tooth in the shape of a unicorn horn, and oh, that incredible fungus on her feet I mean EUGH that is just disgusting"

"Erm James"

"And the way she says my name, _and_ the way she spits on me while she says it"

"James"

"And her breath, WOO, smells worse than my Great Aunt Brenda when she hasn't been out of her bed for three months"

"JAMES!"

"WHAT?"

"We have company" James looked out into the light and saw a furious looking Sirius standing there with his arms folded and a hideous glare plastered across his face.

"Well…I guess it's time to go then…" James said lightly, "Bye!" Without another word and before Sirius could react he had raced from his hiding spot and jumped dangerously onto a moving stair case.

"WHEN I GET YOU POTTER I'M GOING TO MAKE YOU HURT SO BADLY THAT YOU'LL BE BEGGING MY MOTHER TO SHOVE ME BACK INTO HER WOMB!"

"Well at least you know you can fit up there, being as loose as she is" James said to himself, after all, he didn't want to give Sirius any more reason to kick his arse straight back home.

"Sirius…are you ok?" Remus asked cautiously.

"IM FINE! Can't you tell?" He screamed at him. Remus stepped back, stunned.

"Oh of course, how could I not have realised, you're beaming!" He said sarcastically. He rolled his eyes and strolled off to the Great Hall for dinner.

"Stupid werewolf" Sirius muttered.


	8. V

Yeah It's Been Ages Sorry About That.

I Hope It's Ok.

I'm Really Running Out Of Inspiration :s.

Love To All.

**"The List."**

"James!" Lily had spotted James tumbling off a nearby staircase. He looked around and walked away, his gut twisting inside him, she noticed this and started pushing through the crowds of students blocking the corridors "Excuse me- excuse me- oh sorry- coming through- WILL YOU JUST MOVE!" Lily shrilled. The 5th year boy she had just screamed at covered his ears with his hands, gave her a dirty look and hurried off.

"Move out of my way" James grumbled, pushing a little 2nd year over.

"Oh this is useless!" Lily cried out in exasperation. James ran quickly to the Great Hall and dived under the benches.

"Get out you freak!"

"Stop looking up my skirt!"

"Piss off Potter!" James received a kick in the head from some random 7th years who didn't appreciate his presence underneath their feet. He also registered several girls shutting their legs in distress. Much to his disappointment of course.

"I give up!" Lily said, resigned. She sat down at the Gryffindor table and began piling food onto her plate.

"Give up on what?" Samantha asked her, wiping gravy frantically off her skirt.

"Potter"

"Ahh Potter…hmmm"

"Hmmm what?"

"Hmmm"

James decided he would sit down to eat normally. He grabbed some chicken drumsticks and ate them hungrily. He pulled out 'The List' and read through the ignoring step number 3. He looked at Lily quickly, several seats away from him, and looked back down before she noticed. He glanced side-ways, he could see her fully but she could not tell that he was looking at her. He realised that she was staring at him. He gave it two minutes. Then he saw her mouth move…she was holding her breath. He glanced down at his watch.

"19 seconds…20…21…22…23 seconds!" He looked up and sure enough, she was no longer holding her breath and no longer looking at him. It was working, the whole thing was working. It was time to put step number 4 into action. He looked at her and caught her attention by laughing loudly. He flailed a drumstick in the air, pieces of chicken flying out of his mouth as he guffawed. She looked at him strangely and as soon as she had locked eyes with him he burst into a fit of giggles, pointing at her face and making gestures with his drumsticks. She looked away blushing, her red, hot face making the people around her also stare. She felt like a freak, she picked up a napkin from the table and covered her face with it.

"Don't worry Lily, your face is fine" Samantha told her.

"Then why is everyone staring?" She whispered.

"HA!" James said loudly, still waving his drumsticks about. Lily got up from her seat, whimpering and hurried out of the hall. When people looked at her she shot them a dirty look and ran faster.

"There you are Potter!" Sirius had just entered the hall, brushing against Lily as she left. Now was his time to both woo Lily into a sense of false security and to also get the hell away from Sirius, who had a look of death about him.

"And here I go" He got up and scampered down the hall way, narrowly avoiding Sirius' swinging fist as he past. He had nearly made it to the door when BANG, he had fallen to the floor, Hagrid the games keeper hovering over him looking big and clumsy.

"Alrigh' James, Sorry bou' tha'"

"Ha-ha Potter, I've got you now!" Sirius laughed maniacally.

"Argh fu-"

"Excuse me Mr Potter, language please" Dumbledore was suddenly standing above him, surveying his bloody nose (that he had acquired when bumping into the large buckle on Hagrid's belt).

"Sorry sir" James groaned. He made a move to stand up but fell pathetically back down because his head was banging in his skull.

"You need an 'and there James?" Hagrid offered one large table-sized hand to James which he took gratefully. Hagrid hoisted him so far in the air he was in danger of letting go and sending James soaring; however, he landed him safely on the floor and patted his head with a loud thump. James made a note to check if Hagrid had knocked a few inches off his height when he got back to the dorm.

"Ahh Mr Black…just the young man I needed to see" Dumbledore had just noticed Sirius standing there with his bright red face and clenched fists.

"I'm a bit busy at the moment sir" James instantly stepped back a few paces.

"Nonsense Mr Black, what I have in store for you will be twice as rewarding as beating Mr Potter to a pulp"

"Sir I-" Sirius started to say but Dumbledore cut him off.

"Do come along Mr Black, there's a box of Bertie Botts Every Flavoured Beans on offer"

"Fine Sir" Sirius said through gritted teeth, "I'll get _you_ later James"

"Can't wait" James winced. He finally left the Hall and went in search for Lily. He called her name a few times and when he heard no response decided to give up, however, when he stopped walking to tie his shoe, he heard a faint sob coming from somewhere along the corridor. He slowly crept through it trying to make the littlest sound possible and stopped outside a door which he assumed led to a small abandoned storage cupboard.

"Lily?" He called out. The sobbing immediately stopped, "Look Lily I know you're in there"

"I'm not Lily" Came a muffled voice trying to be disguised.

"Oh ok then, I guess I'll just leave"

"Yes you should"

"Ok then…I'm turning to leave…going ever so slowly…nearly turned around now…walking away" James grabbed hold of the door knob and turned it harshly, then he threw open the door which caused Lily to crumple back in surprise at the sudden light that shined around James' silhouette standing in the doorway.

"Leave me alone!" She sobbed, picking up a roll of toilet paper and throwing it lamely at James who dodged it without difficulty.

"I wanted to see if you're ok"

"Ok?! You're the one who upset me"

"What do you mean?"

"You were laughing at me, and you hit me with a piece of chicken"

"I did?"

"Yeah, you can have it back" She picked at a piece of something greasy on her shirt and also threw it at him.

"But why would I laugh at you Lily…you're amazing" She sobbed once more and rubbed her nose with the back of her hand.

"Well you were"

"No I wasn't, I was laughing at someone sitting next to you"

"Then why did everyone look at me funny?"

"Because obviously they don't realise just how beautiful you are"

"Hmmm" She seemed to consider this for a minute and then sniffled and rubbed her nose again, "Why are you being so nice to me?"

"That's not fair; I'm always nice to you"

"No you're always a sexist pig to me"

"I am not!" James said indignantly.

"Are too"

"We're not doing this again"

"We've never done this before"

"Have too!"

"Have not!"

"STOP!"

"Either way you made a fool of me, I can't step foot in that great hall for at least a day! I won't be able to eat breakfast because of _you_"

"I'll bring you some in bed"

"Don't try and flatter me out of this!"

"You have the nicest eyes"

"I know, my mum's told me"

"Well has she told you what beautiful lips you have?"

"Well no but I don't think she needs to- what are you doing Potter?" He had started moving forward towards her, when he was fully inside the cupboard he slammed the door behind them. It was completely dark and he regretted this foolish act.

"Lily…Lily where are you?" He placed his hands out in front of him and patted down the things around him.

"Potter what have you done?" Lily sighed.

"What?"

"You do know the door locks when you shut it from the inside"

"What?"

"I was locked in before you came"

"Why didn't you tell me?"

"I didn't think it important, only an idiot like you would try something like this"

"Well what were you going to do?"

"I don't know, scream and bang on the door"

"Well then why weren't you going to let me enter before?"

"Because I would rather be rescued by someone I like"

"So you would rather be stuck in here for what, days, than be saved by me?

"Pretty much"

"Nice…"

"I can't even see you…but I can feel you! Get off Potter!" Lily started swatting at the space in front of her.

"Lily I'm not touching you…"

"Then what's that…AHHHHH!"

"WHAT?!" Lily started on a rampage, pulling things off shelves and kicking over buckets on the floor.

"Lily calm down" James said trying to grab her arm.

"There's something in here"

"Lily, calm down…LILY!" James received a blow from Lily's fist and he fell back into the wall, a series of objects from the shelf next to him tottered dangerously and James felt them fall off and onto either the floor or his foot.

"OUCH!"

"_Lumos_" Lily shouted, a long stream of light flowed from the tip of her wand. She gasped.

"Lily what is it?"

"There's something behind you…" James spun around and was hit full front in the face by a toilet brush hanging on a hook on the wall.

"A toilet brush Lily!"

"Oh I thought it was…oh never mind" She sighed and leaned back against the wall, only to feel something bristly scratch her back. She pounced into James arms in fright and dropped her wand so its light flickered and died, "James I just felt something!"

"Yes, another toilet brush" James leaned forward and took the object from the wall.

"Oh…well now I just feel silly"

"No you're not Lily, you're perfect"

"Where's my wand?"

"Here, _Lumos_, there it is on the floor" She picked it up and realised just how close her proximity was to James, she shuffled away from him and his face dropped.

"So…what do we do now?" James walked over to the door and started banging hard on it.

"HELP! HELP US!" Lily followed his example and began kicking it with her foot.

"ANYONE…HELP US…PLEASE!"

"I don't think it's going to work"

"It bloody well will Potter, never have I started something that I didn't finish"

"Well if we get hungry at least we have this piece of chicken" James chuckled, nudging the slimy piece of meat on the floor.

"So funny, maybe if I don't die of hunger I'll die of your incredible wit!"

"Look Lily…we might well be stuck in here for a while, while we are, I suggest we at least try to get on"

"You know what Potter?"

"Yes Lily?"

"That's probably the most stupid thing you've suggested all year" And with that she leaned back against the door and sulked. 


	9. Es

Sorry it's taken long.

Being the daft girl I am I spilled tea all over my laptop and ergo it broke!!!

But it should be ok now...

I own no one.

Sorry it's short.

Remember to read and review!!!

x

**'The List'**

"So…"

"Don't say that, I hate it when people say that"

"Why?"

"It's pointless"

"Sorreeeeeeey"  
"Yeah you should be"

"Do you know how difficult it is to talk to you Lily?"  
"I'm guessing pretty hard?"

"Just forget it"

"Nothing to forget" They resigned to their own separate corners. They had been stuck in the cupboard for about an hour. They had given up banging on the door long ago.

James was in desperate need of the list…but he couldn't get it out in front of her. She was super nosy and would come snooping around trying to read it.

He racked his brains for an answer…what was on the list? He remembered vaguely the words "heaven…fell…and baby".

"Got it!" He thought to himself.

"Hey baby, did it hurt when you fell from heaven?"

"Excuse you?" Lily asked, looking at him in a scrutinizing fashion.

"I erm…" Had this been wrong? "Oh shit" He thought to himself. That was what he shouldn't have said.

"Do you think that's funny?"

"I…I don't know…I didn't mean to say it…it just came out"

"Freak, why don't you get something sweet to say or don't say anything at all"

"You're so clever Lily, I wish I could be as clever as you, I bet your parents are so proud" She looked at him briefly and then looked away.

"You're getting warmer" James heart jumped.

"Really?"

"Well I _am_ smart" She grinned.

"You're eyes are absolutely amazing"  
"Yeah…that _is _true" He thought some more and after a minute or two began to say:

"Hey have you lost-" NO JAMES DON'T DO IT! He mentally slapped himself as the words '_This will most probably be the last thing you ever say' _flashed across his mind.

"Lost what?"

"…a hair clip?"

"I don't think so…"

"Ok then" He leaned back against the wall and she copied.

James rolled to face the wall and pulled out the list. With the little light from his wand, his eyes scanned the page and once he knew what to do he shoved it back in his bag and turned to Lily.

"Did you know I sleep with a cuddly dog?" James blurted out.

"Pardon?"

"I do…his names Articus"

"And I wanted to know this because?"

"I dunno…I thought maybe if I told you a secret you would tell me one"

"Why would I do that?"

"Because you trust me"

"Haha!"

"I trust you" She stopped laughing and looked at him for a second. She opened her mouth and closed it again, she repeated this several times before saying:

"If I tell you a secret do you promise not to tell a single soul?"

"Of course I do"

"If you do then Articus will be the front page news of the Daily Prophet. Got it?"

"Lily…why would I jeopardise the trust you have with me" She looked at him a second through squinted eyes. He couldn't tell if this was because of her wand light or because she was considering something.

"Well the thing is…Severus and I are-"

"James! Lily?" James and Lily retreated deep into the cupboard as their eyes tried to adjust to the sudden flood of light.

"Thank God! Remus we've been in here for ages!" Lily gasped, running up to him and hugging him. James stomach dropped. What rubbish timing Remus had.

"We were just in the middle of something actually Remus" James said through gritted teeth, using his head to point in the direction of somewhere he wasn't.

"You were? Ohhh…oooh right! I'll just leave you to it then"

"No we weren't its ok" Lily smiled; she linked arms with Remus and took him off down the corridor. James stared at her dumbfounded, but before she had turned the corner she looked back at him and a small smile spread across her lips. James stomach dropped again.

"YES!" He yelled triumphantly, jumping up and down on the spot like a jack-in-the-box. A fourth year walking past shot him a dirty look to which he barked in reply, "nothing can get me down now!"

"JAMES POTTER YOU HAVE 5 SECONDS TO RUN THE FUCK AWAY BEFORE I SHOVE YOUR OWN SCROTUM DOWN YOUR THROAT!" Sirius dark eyes flashed dangerously.

"I think for once you're being Sirius…" and with that witty comment and his 2 seconds left before 'scrotum down throat time' he ran the fuck away, just as Sirius had suggested.


End file.
